Friends Home in Kennett

Helen Warfel Shares Her Story

In her casual, comfortable room Friends Home in Kennett resident Helen Warfel shares her story.

“I grew up a farmer’s daughter in Delaware, in an area called South Wood. It was a small farm, only 30-some acres, but we had a big apple orchard and always grew a big garden.”

“We had an unusual pet,” she says, pointing to a photograph of a groundhog. “We called him ‘Johnny Chuck’ and fed him with a baby doll bottle at first. As he got older, he would roll onto his back with the bottle and grab it with all four feet,” she laughs. “In winter, he hibernated under our porch, and when he came out in the spring he still knew us. Nature took its course, though, and he left to search for his mate.”

Helen attended Delaware schools until northern Delaware was re-surveyed and “the house we were living in was thrown into Pennsylvania!” Helen was transferred to Kennett High School, where she met her future husband, Bill. “We went together, but not all of the time.”

After high school, Helen attended Beacom College to study accounting. Eventually she went to work for a masonry company and stayed with them for about 20 years. “It was a one-person office, so I did a little bit of everything,” she says.

Helen and Bill married in 1941 and moved to Kennett Square, where they eventually bought a house on Union Street. The couple raised their two daughters, Patricia and Judith, and enjoyed being near their extended family. “We lived in a double house. When the other side came up for sale we bought it and turned it into two apartments,” she explains. “When my mother needed help she moved into the first floor apartment. She lived there the rest of her life, and she lived into her 90s.”

Bill was called into the service during World War II and had just completed training when the war ended. “He was trained as a telephone operator and sent to Europe in the First Occupational Force.” While Bill was training in Alabama, Helen visited. “I rode the bus there and flew back home – it was my first time on a plane,” she exclaims.

“I’m trying to get back to my painting,” Helen says while showing the many oil paintings that hang in her room. “Most of these I painted back in the 1970’s.” Helen recently showed her paintings to fellow residents in a program organized by the Home’s Activities Director. “Everyone seemed to enjoy them, and people asked lots of questions. Now I’m thinking about teaching residents to paint next winter!”

When asked why she chose Friends Home in Kennett, Helen replies, “It’s right here in Kennett Square, so I had known about it for years. It is small and homey – that appealed to me.” She adds, “and it is friendly here.”

Meet Friends Home Resident Betty Ilseman

Sitting in Friends Home in Kennett’s recently-renovated Victorian parlor, Betty Ilseman tells of her life.

“I’ve always lived around here. I was born in Chester County Hospital and grew up around Unionville out in the country. I went to the Unionville schools for all 12 grades.”

“My father was in horticulture and had a big greenhouse. He grew cut flowers and was a supplier for florists. He and another botanist began the first year-round mum production in the world. He was written up in the Saturday Evening Post for it!”

Betty is a graduate of Syracuse University, where she majored in geography. “I never did work outside the home, but if I had I would’ve liked getting into cartography.” But work, she did, raising twin children – a boy, Steven, and a girl, Nancy – gardening, canning and sewing. “Until recently, I made all of my own clothing.” Betty is an accomplished seamstress, having made her husband’s sport coats, her daughter’s wedding dress, and many house wares including drapes, table linens and slip covers. “My husband gave me a sewing machine as a wedding present. I remember that it came with a 30-year guarantee and I thought, ‘Wow. That’s forever,’” she laughs. “And before I knew it, those 30 years had passed.”

“My husband was in horticulture, just like my dad. He got a job in my father’s greenhouse – that’s how we met.” She smiles, “He married the boss’s daughter!”

“I was very active in my church, Church of the Advent here in Kennett,” says Betty. “I sang in the choir for 25 years, and I was a member of the Altar Guild, the group that prepares the altar before services, making sure the candles and linens are all in place.”

“For 10 years, I led a Girl Scout Troop. We did a little bit of everything: camping, craft projects, singing, sewing. And, of course, there were the cookies,” she smiles.

Following a stroke a few years ago, Betty and her family knew that she would no longer be able to live alone, so her daughter, Nancy, started looking for a place for Betty to go. “I’ve known about this place for years. Friends of mine have lived here, and I always knew it was a nice place.” Nancy toured a few places, including Friends Home and then brought Betty for a tour and lunch. “I knew right away that this was the place for me.”

When asked what her favorite thing about Friends Home is, Betty replies, “The family atmosphere. And the staff here is outstanding. Every part of it – from the executive part to the servers to the personal care assistants. Everyone is so nice.” She smiles, “I am very fond of this place.”

A Grateful Spouse Shares His Story

Sitting in Linden Hall’s bright, cheerful dining room, Harry Milliman tells the story of he and his wife, resident Janet Milliman.

“We met in Boston, where I was born and raised.” Janet grew up in Hartford, Connecticut and while attending high school worked for G. Fox and Company, modeling young peoples clothing. “This was back in the days when department stores devoted certain days of the week to showing clothing lines. Janet enjoyed it very much.” After graduating from high school, Janet went to Columbus, Ohio to study calligraphy. On returning to Connecticut, she did calligraphy on diplomas for Yale, Harvard and other schools. Later she took a job in an insurance company in Boston, where she met Harry.

After they were married, Harry attended Bentley College, earning a degree that had been delayed by his service in the Navy during World War II. The couple moved to Connecticut where Harry took a job with the Remington Arms Company. They built a house in Newtown, Connecticut, where they lived for 50 years. Janet worked off and on and became active in many community groups including garden and horticulture clubs. During his 30 year tenure with Remington, Harry eventually became manager of accounts receivable, accounts payable and credit. He traveled throughout the United States and Canada visiting customers.

Janet and Harry enjoyed traveling and visited Florida, Bermuda, Hawaii and the Caribbean many times. “We especially enjoyed, whenever possible, staying in ‘native’ hotels instead of large resorts, and that way really got to know the local people and their culture.” Traveling with friends from Connecticut, the couple traveled around the world, especially where they could be in a warmer climate and near water.

“Then Janet came down with Alzheimer’s.” After going to an adult day care center for about four years, she lived in an assisted living facility in Connecticut for four years. “And then her niece, who lives near Linden Hall, said, ‘Why don’t you come down this way? It made sense because we had family down here, but no one in Connecticut.” Harry then made arrangements for Janet to move to Linden Hall in March 2007. “As luck would have it, upon putting our house on the market it was sold within 4 ½ hours!” In July 2007, Harry moved to Greenville, Delaware and subsequently into a nearby retirement community.

“I’m so happy to be here. My experience as a visitor and family member at Linden Hall has been perfect. They take wonderful care of each resident and because Linden Hall is a smaller facility no resident lacks for personal attention,” says Harry. “Most importantly, my wife Janet seems to be very happy here.”

A Resident Talks About Living At Friends Home In Kennett

One of the best ways to decide if a particular independent or assisted living residence is a good fit for you is to talk to people who live there.

Meet 93-year-old Pete Bodine. He has resided at Friends Home in Kennett for more than nine years and says “there is no where else I would rather live.”

A native of New York State (a small town called Pennyan in the Finger Lakes region), the retired mail carrier and World War II veteran was living alone after his wife of 33 years, Virginia, passed away.

“My son Danny and his family live in Chester County,” Mr. Bodine explains. “He didn’t like me living by myself so far away. So I came down here for a visit to see if we could find a place in the area for me to live and be taken care of for the rest of my life.

“My son had me all over and we visited a lot of different places,” he continues. “But I knew right away that Friends Home was the place for me.”

Mr. Bodine says that it was the warm and friendly atmosphere that he noticed right away.

“I love the personality of the home,” he says. “You never see anyone here who looks unhappy. And I can’t say enough great things about the staff.

Mr. Bodine especially appreciated that care after a recent eye operation. “I needed to have special eye drops at 8 pm every night. One night I didn’t feel like taking them and said I would do it tomorrow. At exactly 8 pm a staff person knocked on my door and said ‘ I’ve come to give you the eye drops that you’re supposed to have.”

He laughs. “They are really dedicated and give you excellent attention.”

His social life and activities calendar are also full. “My fellow residents are very outgoing and I have made quite a few friends,” he notes. “I also enjoy taking the day trips they plan for us. Two of my favorites were going to see the USS New Jersey in Camden — I was in the Navy during World War II and spent a lot of time on ships — and taking a dinner cruise on the Spirit of Philadelphia — what a ball we had.”

Mr. Bodine says he even has special praise for the food and kitchen staff at Friends Home in Kennett.

“I am a very picky eater and can be a big complainer,” he says with a smile. “The people who work in the kitchen go out of their way to help you and I can always get something I like.”

Mr. Bodine concludes that Friends Home’s Assisted Living provides the perfect balance of independence and assistance.

“You always have the help you need but you also have all the privacy and freedom you want.”

Meet Joe Cloud

Joe Cloud ran an appliance store directly across the street from Friends Home in Kennett for more than 35 years. “I always used to look across the street and see the residents sitting and talking on the front porch,” Joe remembers. “It looked very nice but I never thought I’d be moving in.”

But move in he did. Ten years ago at the age of 94. And on April 6, 2010, Joe celebrated his 104^th birthday at Friends Home – surrounded by family and friends. Joe says he “has had a wonderful life with no regrets” but never dreamed he would live to be 104. “I had polio and was disabled as a little boy,” he explains. “They had to operate on one of my legs in 1910 and I had 90 stitches in it.” He recovered but his movement and walking were always affected. Joe says he never felt sorry for himself and he always had a “can do” attitude.

In 1916, his family moved to Longwood from Hamorton. He attended school in Kennett and graduated from Kennett High School, where he served as class president in 1925.

Joe laughs that he has “been married his whole life.” He was wed and widowed twice. He was married to his first wife Lenore for 32 years and his second wife Lillian for 36 years. He has two children, Jack and Louise, four grandchildren and six great-grandchildren.

After retiring from owning Cloud Appliance, Joe bought a cottage in Elkside, Maryland and enjoyed fishing and boating on the Chesapeake. He still visits the cottage with his family. At Friends Home in Kennett, Joe is currently chairman of the Residents’ Council and enjoys participating in many of the activities offered, such as daily exercise programs.

A lifelong Phillies fan, Joe also enjoys listening to the games and visiting friends when his daughter or son can drive him.

On the occasion of his 100^th birthday, Joe says he especially wanted to thank the staff of Friends Home in Kennett “for their tender loving care – they are the best.”

When asked what advice he would give to others who want to reach the 100 milestone he concludes, “Live a good life and follow the Golden Rule. Take vitamins and don’t smoke.”

Meet Friends Home in Kennett Resident Virginia Gunn

vgunn “I want to stay very involved in life and contribute as much as I can to the community.”

That is a philosophy Friends Home in Kennett resident Virginia Gunn lives every day. From teaching English as a second language, to being an active member of an informal Shakespeare club, to Bible study, singing with the Home’s choir and sitting on the International Relations Committee of the League of Women Voters – the bi-lingual 88-year-old native of Woodstock, NY is never at a loss for interesting events and activities.

And Friends Home in Kennett, she says, fits her lifestyle perfectly.

Virginia and her husband had lived in a large house in Nottingham and after he passed away she eventually moved into a condominium in Kennett Square. Then she put herself on a waiting list for Friends Home.

“I knew people who lived here and loved it,” she explains. “I liked the idea of a Quaker community and assisted living and skilled nursing services being available if I should need them.

“The staff members are the warmest, friendliest people you will ever meet,” she continues. “Everyone respects you as individual and you can always do what you want at your own pace”

Her active pace began when she was just a baby and her father moved the family to France where Virginia lived until she was 12. After graduating from Swarthmore College in 1942 her knowledge of French helped her get a government job in Washington, DC that, after D-Day in 1944, took her to England and from there to liberated France, where she met her future husband, Harold. Harold and Virginia were married in 1946 in England. In 1949, the couple, with their two children, went to Nigeria, where Harold gathered material for a book.

The couple and their three children settled in Chester County when Virginia’s husband got a job teaching anthropology at Lincoln University, where she taught French. She is also very proud that the couple was involved in the Civil Rights movement during the 1960’s.

One of her fondest memories, she recalls, was being in Washington, DC in 1963 and hearing Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. deliver his “I Have A Dream” speech.

Virginia enjoys sharing these memories and discussing many issues and events with the friends she has made at Friends Home.

Virginia’s Mexican English language student comes for a lesson in her apartment twice a week. The International Relations Committee of the League of Women Voters meets in the library of Friends Home once a month.

“There are many interesting people who work and live here. I am very happy a friend of mine encouraged me years ago to come and visit Friends Home. It is just a wonderful environment here.”

Meet Friends Home in Kennett Resident
Alma Struble

A room of one’s own without being alone. astruble

That is the beauty of living at Friends Home in Kennett according to 96-year-old resident Alma Struble.

“Everyone on the staff goes out of their way to be helpful and encouraging,” she explains. “They anticipate what you may need. They look out for you and will do as much or as little as you want.

“For example, I am in Assisted Living but I insist on making my own bed every day.”

Originally from Philadelphia, Struble lived for 80 years in a Marlborough farmhouse with 12 acres near Unionville where she and her husband raised their four children.

A graduate of Middlebury College in Vermont, Alma taught Latin and French at Unionville High School for five years before stopping when she had her first child. But she didn’t exactly stop teaching altogether.

The Struble’s property contained a very large pond that was perfect for swimming. So she organized a program, with a few other mothers in the area, to teach any child who wanted to learn how to swim.

“I think every kid in the ‘greater Marlborough area’ went in that pond at one time or another,” she says with a laugh. “Those were fun days and great memories.”

One day in 2006, however, living alone in the big farmhouse became impractical. Struble was in the hospital recovering from a cracked pelvic bone that was the result of a fall.

“My balance was bad and I needed to use a walker,” she says. “There was no way I could go back home by myself. Thankfully, one of my sons knew about Friends Home.

“I moved in directly from the hospital and I liked it immediately,” she continues. “You feel the warmth as soon as you come through the doors. I have my own room, my own furniture – everything I want.”

Struble says one of her favorite aspects of life at Friends Home is the extensive activities program she enjoys participating in with her fellow residents – many of whom she now calls friends.

“They have a great big calendar with all activities that are scheduled for every day of the month so you can plan everything you want to do,” she explains. “I love the variety of games and the visits from the therapy dogs because I love animals. I also enjoy working in the Friends Home garden. We just have a great time here!”

When not engaged in activities, Struble, a self-described “outdoor addict” can often be found enjoying the fresh air on the porch. “It’s never too cold to be outside,” is her motto.

Alma says she would never again want to live alone.

“I am definitely a member of a large extended family,” she concludes. “And this is home in every sense of the word.”